Daily Archives: May 30, 2012

Astounding Quotes About American Baseball

  • Alan Sutton Sothoron pitched his initials off today. — Anonymous, St. Louis newspaper
  • All I remember about my wedding day in 1967 is that the Cubs lost a doubleheader. — George F. Will
  • Never root for a team whose uniforms have elastic stretch waistbands. — Susan Sarandon
  • There ain’t much to being a ballplayer, if you’re a ballplayer. — Honus Wagner
  • Us ballplayers do things backward. First we play, then we retire and go to work. — Charlie Gehringer
  • The funny thing about these uniforms is that you hang them in the closet and they get smaller and smaller. — Curt Flood
  • Sure I played, did you think I was born age 70 sitting in a dugout trying to manage guys like you? — Casey Stengel, to Mickey Mantle
  •  When you start the game, they don’t say “Work ball!” They say “Play ball!” — Willie Stargell
  • There are two theories on hitting the knuckleball. Unfortunately, neither one of them works. — Charlie Lau
  • The way to catch a knuckleball is to wait until the ball stops rolling and then to pick it up. — Bob Uecker
  • Think! How the hell are you gonna think and hit at the same time? — Yogi Berra
  • The majority of American males put themselves to sleep by striking out the batting order of the New York Yankees. — James Thurber
  • A hot dog at the game beats roast beef at the Ritz. — Humphrey Bogart
  • He’s the strangest hitter in baseball. Figure him out one way and he’ll kill you another. — Sandy Koufax on Roberto Clemente
  • As a nation we are dedicated to keeping physically fit — and parking as close to the stadium as possible. — Bill Vaughan
  • Slump? I ain’t in no slump. I just ain’t hitting. — Yogi Berra
  • A man once told me to walk with the Lord. I’d rather walk with the bases loaded. — Ken Singleton
  • I’d be willing to bet you, if I was a betting man, that I have never bet on baseball. — Pete Rose
  • Little League baseball is a very good thing because it keeps the parents off the streets. — Yogi Berra
  • Lasorda’s standard reply when some new kid would ask directions to the whirlpool was to tell him to stick his foot in the toilet and flush it. — Steve Garvey
  • If you don’t succeed at first, try pitching. — Jack Harshman
  • The Hall of Fame is for baseball people. Heaven is for good people. — Jim Dwyer
  • So I’m ugly. So what? I never saw anyone hit with his face. — Yogi Berra