Outside the Pubs: How the Brits are Speaking of America

“Talk about throwing a spanner in the works[1], those Americans have really picked themselves a tosser[2] haven’t they?”

“Bob’s your uncle![3] There are not enough bog rolls[4] in the world to clean up their shambles[5].”

“Have you seen how the all too chuffed [6] wanker[7] came across the Atlantic and attempted to gut[8] NATO, too?”

“Blimey! Toff[9] Trump has lost the plot[10] and It seems he cares more about his dodgy[11] Russian business partners than our long history of Western civilization alliances.”

“Those same bloaks knicked[12] their election! They got shagged.[13]”

“You know your onions[14]. The nutter[15] punter[16] has knocked the sod off[17] the prime ministers of at least three countries in less than a fortnight[18].”

“Absobloodylootely![19] I’d say so and how that it is not at all ace[20] to be misogynistic, racist, egomaniac, and xenophobic.”

“The greedy plonker[21] may be off to Bedfordshire[22] with the chav[23].”

“Gobsmacked[24] I am!”

“Couldn’t their citizens become knackered[25] and make the oaf redundant[26]?”

“No, not even one off.[27] Their system works wonky[28], unlike ours.”

“What now, is  the tactless, belligerent fool always on the pull?[29]

“Or must he see a nasty man about a dog?[30]”

“I’d wager more than a tad[31] if his mother was alive,

she’d spank his pompous arse.[32]

stop

Plonker!?!

= = = =

[1] Screw up = “Throw a spanner in the works”

[2] Idiot = Tosser; a.k.a. Daft Cow

[3] There you go! = “Bob’s your uncle”

[4] Toilet paper = Blog Roll

[5] Mess; Plan gone wrong = Shambles

[6] Proud = Chuffed

[7] Idiot = Wanker or Knob-Head

[8] Tried to devastate = Gut

[9] Upper Class Person = Toff

[10] Gone crazy = Lost the Plot

[11] Suspicious = Dodgy

[12] Stolen = Nicked

[13] Screwed = Shagged

[14] Being knowledgeable = Know your onions

[15] Crazy Person = Nutter

[16] Prostitute’s Client = Punter

[17] Pissed-off = Sod-off

[18] Two weeks = Fortnight

[19] Yes! = Absol-bloody-lutely!

[20] Cool = Ace

[21] Idiot = Plonker

[22] Going to bed = “I’m off to Bedfordshire”

[23] White Trash = Chav

[24] Amazed = Gobsmacked

[25] Tired = Nackered

[26] Fired from a job = Made redundant

[27] One time only = One Off

[28] Not Right = Wonky

[29] Looking for Sex = “On the Pull”

[30] Do a deal or take a dump = “See a man about a dog”

[31] Little Bit = Tad

[32] Rear End / Fat Buttocks = Arse

= = = =

copyright 2018

Max’s Scout Services & Communications of the Americas, LLC

“for musement only”

 

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About Max's Scout Services and Communications of the Americas, LLC

WRITER / MANAGEMENT CONSULTANT / SPORTS FAN / HUMORIST/ FOOD CRITIC / HORSE AND DOG OWNER / CHRISTIAN / MEMBER OF THE COLORADO GREEN PARTY / ALOHA SPIRIT /

Posted on August 18, 2018, in D O G S, Humor, L O V E, Patriotism, Politics, Socioeconomics and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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